Friday, December 21, 2007

Where Has the Time Gone?

Friday, December 21, 2007

So I was just looking at all of my pictures I have stored on the computer and I came across one's of the day Gracie was born. I can not believe my eyes! She was soooooooooooooo tiny! I can't believe how huge she is. I am going to wake up one of these morning's and she is going to be a woman! For all of you out there that have posted that I look skinny, your eyes are bad, but thank you for the oh so sweet compliments! I don't think I will ever lose this weight! I have to remember what Mel says, it's the joys of motherhood! I don't know how many of you know what happened to me the day Gracie came into this world, but it was a scary experience to say the least. I got something called eclampsia with HELLP syndrome. Very rare, but of course it happened to me. I gained like 50 pounds of fluid in a matter of a few hours and someone at Mckay Dee was kind enough to snap a picture of me with Gracie and Luke right after I had Gracie. I would post it, but I would blind all of you! I am just so blessed to be here and that I am able to take care of my sweet little girl. I take so many things for granted. I am so blessed that I still have feeling in my feet and that my kidneys are still hanging in there, even though they could be a lot better. My vision is poor, but I am so blessed that I can still see the beautiful gifts that Heavenly Father gives me each and every day. I used to dread the thought of having to give me an IV for my pump every other day, now I look at it more as my life support and something that will help me live another day with Gracie and my cute family. Too often I spend my time worrying about things that can't be changed and how Luke will raise Gracie when I am gone. I need to just enjoy each day to the fullest.

Every night when I tuck Gracie in and kiss her goodnight, I can't stop looking at her and how perfect she is. I don't want anything to ever hurt her, or for her to be sad or lonely or to not know how much her Mom loves her. I hope that I live a very long, healthy, happy life, but my odds aren't great. I want Luke to be able to let her know just how much I love her and how proud I am of her and the little girl she is becoming. I want her to know that no matter what, I will always be in her heart, always.


Mel said...

Oh, Lisa that was so precious. I was getting chills just reading it. I'm sure you are the best mom and I am sure little Gracie knows how much you love her. And I am so glad you are still here!! Love ya.

Stephanie said...

Oh, Lisa! You made me cry! You are such a good mommy, and one of the most deserving people in the world. You're right - they grow up so fast. I always have to remind myself of that when I get frustrated or busy. Gracie picked you to be her mommy for a reason - because she knew how much she would be loved and pampered and be able to grow up with such wonderful parents.

Lisa said...

You guys are all to sweet. I am truly blessed to have such special friends!

Rusty and Janis said...

Thank you for making me cry!!
I need to make a trip down real soon to come see you and this cute little girl of yours.
I just want to let you know that you are such a great example. I have no idea what I would do without you in my life. You are such a strong person and no matter what trials you are given you seem to have such a great attitude.

Lisa said...

Janis, you are the one that is such a great example to me. You are always so positive and you have always been there for me. Thank you so much for being such a special friend. I love you!

sharpest family said...

My goodness Lisa, you made me cry too. You are such a great example to me. I really do forget how precious life and my sweet little girls are because they came to me so easily. I hope we're both around to see great-great grandkids. (That's a long time!) I always think about dying too and what would happen to Aaron and my girls. I just told him last night that if I went that he should move Allyson in until he gets married again. Heck maybe he'd just marry her! It's awful to think about but I always do, it sounds like you do too. I can't even imagine losing you Lisa. You're such an important part of my past and present. Take care of yourself! I love you so much! Bonnie